13 Comments
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Jameson Anders's avatar

As a homeschooled Christian graduate of whatever year this is, this was the commencement speech I needed but didn’t get, because I didn’t get a commencement speech, because of woke.

Jaimie's avatar

Check your DM. Mission accomplished.

Cindy Rinna's avatar

“Some people say that the future will be made of technology, which is in a book called Brave New World by Arthur Conan Doyle, but that book was written in the past, as most books are.”

Fantastic 😂

Louise Loten's avatar

You scooped this from DJT! I KNEW I’d heard it somewhere …

Fiona Colombo's avatar

So sorry your sex scandals sidelined you this year. The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing, and you're doing your mistresses, ergo you're doing your part to prevent the triumph of evil. Thank you.

Jaimie's avatar

I may have to use this speech as a theater audition cold read. Please stay tuned as the audition will be available to watch pro bona fide-lis semper something about the Marines

Laura Murphy's avatar

Nope, not gonna write my comment. But it definitely has something to do with being a pro. I'll go be 12 now...

matthew pierce's avatar

laura write it

the people want you to

Clint Wrede's avatar

What if my name is also Miranda?

Amelia Kennedy's avatar

As I was reading, laughing, I’m thinking maybe finally this is one I can share with my friends, but I’m still not sure because of the note at the start 😂

matthew pierce's avatar

i will never stoop to the level of writing something that can be widely shared

that is my solemn pledge

Matthew Adams's avatar

At our school our commencement speaker was a dude who got all melted in the Veitnam war then became a Christian and he tried to guilt us into being inspiring people because if he could inspire people when he was all melty then we could easily do it because we weren't all melted. Except for Sarah. She was pimply.

Anyway, i blame you for all my poor life decisions because you weren't our commencement speaker!

Sasha Irish's avatar

Thank you for reminding me to go listen to Explosions in the Sky