Carrion Call was the Christian metal band that should've existed here but certainly does in an alternate timeline. As we know, the atheist pope conspiracy has to do with time travel, so maybe it has to do with said band; anyhow, we're already privy to the assassins present in the time of the dinosaurs, thanks to you.
Matthew, I can't tell if you are being serious or satirical. Jimmy Swaggart was 90 years old when he died; John MacArthur was 86, and James Dobson was 89. Yes, these three gentlemen were part of a fabulous cohort, and we all benefitted from their wisdom. However, I don't see anything amiss about three elderly men passing away. They all were fortunate to live long, productive lives. Old age is a privilege denied to many.
The passing of an entire generation of well-known leaders is a disorienting moment for the church. It can easily lead to the cynical absurdity you capture so well here, or to the conspiracy theories—and the people who hold them—that this piece so effectively mocks.
For me, it's a powerful reminder to check our foundations. If our hope was in a man, a movement, or an era, we'll be left with cynicism. But if our hope is in Christ, the church's true head, then we can have peace. He is the only 'J' name on which everything actually rests.
You have something with this Jewish popes cabal. Larry David (comedy), Bruce Springsteen (music), and Adrian Brody (also comedy). There, I called them out.
Carrion Call was the Christian metal band that should've existed here but certainly does in an alternate timeline. As we know, the atheist pope conspiracy has to do with time travel, so maybe it has to do with said band; anyhow, we're already privy to the assassins present in the time of the dinosaurs, thanks to you.
They’re playing go fish but ur playing 7D chess with the power of ur brand
someone has to put my brand's interests first
Hoopes! He did it again!
How naive of you to think THEY are done with the purge of the J-names. These people need to go into hiding:
John Piper, Robert Jeffress, David Jeremiah, Phil Johnson, Bill Johnson, John Hagee, Cindy Jacobs, Jerry Falwell Jr.
Please, all of them, far away and into hiding.
Folks, I saw at least one em dash in here. This means AI is most certainly behind all of the old people dying.
ok but how do we know that u are not AI
I should NOT have read this in church!!!
disagree, should have read it from the pulpit imo
Thank you for putting the puzzle pieces together for us. You’ve gone right down the rabbit hole into the lizard men-filled hollow earth.
Matthew, I can't tell if you are being serious or satirical. Jimmy Swaggart was 90 years old when he died; John MacArthur was 86, and James Dobson was 89. Yes, these three gentlemen were part of a fabulous cohort, and we all benefitted from their wisdom. However, I don't see anything amiss about three elderly men passing away. They all were fortunate to live long, productive lives. Old age is a privilege denied to many.
Thank you! I wholeheartedly agree. Unfortunately cynicism, gets views, so its the tone of much of what passes for writing around here.
*carrion call*! It's probably a sin because my name doesn't begin with J, but I have just joined the ranks of the deceased.
We're out of raisins? Made laugh, but I don't know why.
wish i could tell you what that joke means, but i don't know either
Insightful. Brilliant analysis!
Tim Keller already died, too! (But back in 2023 - maybe the alphabet is going backwards. So "I" is next?)
that's what the evangelical industrial complex wants u to believe brother
Ah.
The E.I.C.......
Bastards.
They've got their grubby fingers in all of the p̶i̶o̶u̶s̶ pies.
Umm, because they’re old?
The passing of an entire generation of well-known leaders is a disorienting moment for the church. It can easily lead to the cynical absurdity you capture so well here, or to the conspiracy theories—and the people who hold them—that this piece so effectively mocks.
For me, it's a powerful reminder to check our foundations. If our hope was in a man, a movement, or an era, we'll be left with cynicism. But if our hope is in Christ, the church's true head, then we can have peace. He is the only 'J' name on which everything actually rests.
I mean … it's implied in the word decrepit.
You have something with this Jewish popes cabal. Larry David (comedy), Bruce Springsteen (music), and Adrian Brody (also comedy). There, I called them out.