188 Comments

I have not laughed so hard at anything on the internet for a very long time. This did my soul so much good today!

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This is writing genius.

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I got in trouble once for having shoulders in church, so now sometimes when its warm outside I wear my calves and ankles to church as well as my shoulders. Now at my chruch, whenever I walk in, all of the men's faces melt off like that nazi's face at the end of Indiana Jones and the Lost Ark.

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Do you also show your Jeze-belly???

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Tell me that's not a term anyone used without irony.

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As someone who was bludgeoned by and internalized the stumbling block message from a very tender age, I love this.

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I can't wait for the people that don't understand satire to take this seriously

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As a woman with breasts and a butt, I hate to tell ya. I also have a VA Jay Jay. Distressing I know. Slippery slope be damned, I didn't even ask for it, my lady parts were granted by, I believe, the Creator, no?

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Wrong. That is what is known as the Vajarian Heresy.

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OMG i started off thinking that this was a real Conservatives think piece. I am so glad I was correct. I have ben trying to get my church to pay for Bre#$t reductions and rear end reductions for years Thankyou for this, I will take this to my mens group tonight.

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This is the kind of humor that one can appreciate only if they've actually read their bibles! I love it!

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This is one of the funniest things I think I have EVER read in my entire life.

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12 epistles! Lol. Balaam rode an ass so hard.. Go to the Greek!

Thank you so much for sharing your brilliant mind with us!! 😊

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On a hike in college I was so afraid of my baptist boyfriend seeing my ass that when I had to go to the bathroom I just shit my own pants instead of asking to go in the bushes nearby. I hope he's still a virgin because if he's not then my sacrifice was in vain.

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brooke

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This was hilarious.

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Please replace the Babylon Bee 😂

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I looked at a peach this morning, visually, and wanted to have a sex so bad!

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The peach was on veggie tales. Your Childrens programming may never be the same.

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Username checks out.

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This is stellar work.

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Thanks for the laughs.

Signed,

Me & my Christian derriere 🍑

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