37 Comments

I started LOL-ing (if this is still a thing) at the list of Christian books on the market, especially at 'I am a beautiful woman in a wide-brimmed hat', and kept going... Love this liturgical word salad of hot takes!

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Oh, Braxton and Brayden

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I once went to a homeschool conference full of women in wide-brimmed hats and I have never felt more conspicuous being hatless in my life.

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my youth pastor warned me about worldly girls like u, smh

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Clever.

Whatever compelled you to write this, follow that prompting. It was a Lit Urge.

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You forgot about the other twins, Brinkley and Bisquick, who are on the synchronized swimming travel team.

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This is eight paragraphs or something like that and I laughed out loud at least five times.

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i shall try harder next time sir/ma’am

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😭😭😭bro I’m dying

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Brilliant! This might be my favorite piece of yours, ever, and I’m a fan of them all.

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I just stumbled across this Substack a few days ago. You have a gift! Why is “What if Bible True?”so funny to me?😆

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Needed this.

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Even the secular world recognizes the need for Liturgy in these troubling times, that’s why Fantano gave their last album a nine point something grade

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This is so incredibly funny I don’t know what to do with myself.

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the next one will be even worse

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Let's be real, Brayden's the star. Braxton's just there for the bubble gum and superfluous wrist bands. Either way, it's worth the $20k/year I'm paying for each of them, so Brayden can get a $8k scholarship in 10 years.

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deep cut. respect

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"Because Liturgy" would be a good title for a book.

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I'm glad you listed, in bullet points, the five Christian book recipes that are published now. Someone needed to raise awareness.

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we used to give book deals to stars of duck dynasty in this country

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Is that the rare out-of-production Precious Moments Magic Eight Ball you are talking about? Always wanted one of those.

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