16 Comments

Is it wrong if I want all endings? Feels like something my youth pastor warned me about.

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Blue ending. I laughed my butt off at the Calvinist robot line too!

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Orange ending !

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This is awesome😂 I got purple ending!

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BLUE, ALL THE WAY. Favorite howler: "BE MERCIFUL; I AM A CALVINIST ROBOT, I DO NOT HAVE FREE WILL.”

Also, why can't the last option be Clone HH? Anyway, Chase has been blinded like the entire shebang

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by the time i got to clone HH, my brain was 1000% fried

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That's totally fair...It did cross my mind how long this must've taken. Quite the magnum opus.

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Every single ending is epic. Aside from the hidden Secret Ending, that one's just ok. Needs more Hugh Hefner.

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ugh yet again there are women in my mentions clamoring for more hugh hefner

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I love this - choosing the Newsboys was wild!

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I got the blue ending and then read it to my wife and she chose the blue ending too! Wuv!! 😂😂😂 I'm a Calvinist Robot!!!!

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I couldn't agree more.

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Thank you, Matthew, for this uproarious piece. I was thoroughly amused.

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more christian thinkers need to be writing about cleavage and nunchucks and clones imo

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Blue ending! This is insane. I love it. I’m going back for the rest.

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you chose well, i guess?

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